Now this isn't something I've worked hours on, and it's not a review of any kind that's for sure. This is just me telling you about my 1st experience playing Super Mario Land today. As many of you may know, I am NOT a Mario fan. The only Mario games I enjoy are Super Mario Bros, The NEW Super Mario Bros, and Super Mario World(in small doses). So don't argue my points, I'm not going to LIKE Mario games just because you do or because "they're the 1st platforming games that broke many boundaries including the platformer's jump to 3D". I know all this, and I know they aren't bad games, I just don't like them. Now for my story:
So I woke up this morning like any other day. Bored as hell and wanting something new. I had just spent the previous night playing Gameboy Games on my GBA. When all of a sudden it hit me. I had NEVER played Super Mario Land!! So I quickly went online to a reliable emulation website to download this game. That's right, I emulated it, WHY? because that's what I do when I'm unsure of a game. If I like it, I'll buy it, if not it's a free rental. Anyways back to my story.. So I get the game rolling and right away I think my emulator or the ROM is screwed up because there's no fuggin SOUND at the Title Screen! I re-load the rom and turn up my volume just incase. Still no sound, so I shrug and hit start only to be blessed by one of the catchiest and greatest tunes to grace any video game.. EVER!
Once I get rolling in the game I find that it plays ALOT like Super Mario Bros, but with a few differences. The differences I found weren't GOOD differences at the beginning but things slowly changed. I started the 1st level and noticed that although everything IS small on screen, I'm quite a bit larger than everything else, even when I'm little Mario. This gets a little annoying when you're trying to jump on ledges and even when you're trying to jump on something's head. It's not THAT big of a deal once you get used to it though. Another thing I QUICKLY noticed was that the Koopa Troopas don't fuck around in this game. They're like the Al-Qeada of Koopa Troopas! These motherfuckers have bombs strapped to their backs and when you kill them they go out with a bang. This isn't a bad thing per se, but it did throw me off at 1st when I was trying to kick the damned thing. Another thing I noticed that I found to be fairly shitty was that the Power Flowers(or whatever the hell they're called) suck complete ASS! Sure these ones bounce off walls and collect coins, but they bounce at like a 40 degree angle when you throw them, then bounce off the ground and go up into the air never to be seen again. This was probably the thing that pissed me off the most about the game, which really isn't that bad because the only time I'd ever found fireballs to be really useful is when you're in some sort of tunnel, and these ones kick extra ass when you're in a tunnel because they're bouncing off the walls killing shit like crazy!
Anyways enough about the little changes. I finish the 1st level and WTF!? There are 2 doors! Of course I decide to take the top door (who wouldn't?) and it leads me to a bonus game in between levels! This bonus game is all luck as far sa I've found but it's still fun as hell and is an easy way to get extra lives. Speaking of extra lives, this game is VERY lenient on extra lives. And really, that's a good thing mainly because this IS a freaking hand-held game and if you're continuously getting game overs and having to start from scratch, you're never going to fully enjoy this game.
So I eventually make it to the 1st Boss. I was expecting to see King Koopa like always but OH SHIT NO!! It was this crazy ass sphinx waiting to fuck my shit up! I tried different ways of beating him and failed miserably, then eventually realized that if u just jump over his lower fireball and book it beneath him I can hit the switch and ruin his shit. I get through the gate expecting to see that asshole Toad telling me unless I'm into man on man intimacy I'm boned, but instead there she is, Princess Daisy!! I say "Hi" then she turns into a monster and flies away. THAT'S CRUEL!!
So I keep playing through the game, the levels are really interesting. I'm in this flying fish level but the fish fly more like they would in a Sonic The Hedgehog game. The platforming is great, you can get mushrooms but they fall straight down instead of angled, which is no big deal unless there are two canons firing above you and the mushroom falls into a pit right next to you..
After a few more levels I make it to what could be the greatest addition to any Mario game EVER!! An underwater level. Not just ANY underwater level though, Mario's in a fuckin submarine loaded to the nuts with missiles! Seriously, whoever decided to throw R-Type levels in a Super Mario game is a genius! So I blast my way through this level and make it to a boss who also fights just like a R-Type or Life Force-like boss, just a lot easier. I kill him then haveta blow my way through these blocks to get to the exit.
From here on things go back to the old platforming gameplay (although I heard there's a level where you fly an airplane and it's much like the Submarine level). I didn't beat the game because I had no clue what to do when I got to that part where the entire ground is spikes. I'm assuming I have to somehow get across but I couldn't figure it out, maybe next time.
My final notes: This game is awesome! I dislike 95% of the Mario games, but this one completely stands out! It's like the original Super Mario Bros with a twist! There were some things that probably could have been made a little better when it came to your size and the controls(I sometimes found that I would take 1 extra step after I was done hold down the D-pad even when walking), but once you get over the little flaws this truly was an incredible experience. To me this was the same experience I got from playing Super Mario Bros for the 1st time on the NES back when I was 4! Everything was new to me, and the Submarine level was just the icing on the cake! If I were to rank this among the other Mario games that I like, it would be 2nd with Super Mario Bros taking 1st and Super Mario World taking 3rd.
Well thanks for reading if you've made it this far. I never thought I would go into this much detail and write for so long, but I did.. If you enjoyed this please, go find a game that you've heard so much about and give it a try. It may even become one of the greatest games you'd ever played. The moral of the story I suppose is that it doesn't matter if you don't like the series, you can't judge a game until you've played it!